Her Broken Circle
by Sarah August
Summary: Based after the 5x11 episode. AU. The Originals return and manage to save Katherine, but it has an unexpected consequence. Forever each others shadow self, Elena is fated to lead the opposite life of her doppelganger. Elena awakens as a human. Her relationships with everyone change forever as result. Namely her relationship with Elijah. Elena considers suicide. Elijah/Elena
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Her Broken Circle**

**Summary: **Based after the new episode on Jan 23rd. The Originals returned to Mystic Falls and Elijah saved Katherine by turning her into a vampire. But there was an unexpected consequence for Katherine's doppelganger. As doppelgangers they are fated to forever be the others shadow self. Elena awakens after Katherine's transformation and realizes that she is human again. Her relationship with Damon is in jeopardy as he wanted her as a vampire and her feelings for Stefan have reemerged along with her humanity. But Stefan may no longer feel the same way about her. Elena struggles to deal with the changes to her life and how relationships with those she cares about changes along with it. The one she blames for returning her to her humanity may turn out to be the most important relationship of all.

**Notes: **Elijah/Elena pairing eventually. Salvatore's/Elena, Elijah/Katherine, Stefan/Katherine. Elena thinks of suicide in this story.

**Author: **Sarah August

**Disclaimer: **I do not own The Vampire Diaries

"_How does it feel?" She taunted her._

"_How does what feel?" Elena questioned._

_She hadn't been feeling the same way since she had become a vampire. Old relationships were no longer as important as they once were. Becoming a vampire had been all about new experiences for Elena. And that meant letting go of Stefan. Something she would have felt was impossible to do as a human. He'd been her world, her everything. But when she had become this way, nothing like that no longer mattered. Damon had taught her how to let all of that go._

"_To lose everything that you ever cared about," Her shadow self taunted her. "To lose everyone that you loved." _

_Elena blinked. She knew loss, but some of that pain had lessened with the return of her brother, and then Bonnie. And she had Damon. She had every reason to be happy. _

"_Do you really think that Damon will still want you like this?" Her shadow self told her almost gleefully. "I would stand a better chance with him than you." _

_Katherine's face then changed before her and Elena screamed as vampire Katherine tried to kill her inside of her dream before she awakened completely. _

* * *

The dream world faded and Elena Gilbert was the most awake she'd been for the first time in months. She hissed when air filled her lungs and she looked wildly around the familiarity of Damon's bedroom to find her boyfriend gone.

Elena, after several minutes to calm herself down, rose from Damon's bed and dressed for the day, all while not being able to fight this new feeling of alertness she had awakened with.

Elena left the bathroom after getting ready for the day and walked over to the large windows inside Damon's bedroom to enjoy the sunshine. Elena felt the warmth go through her which made her feel incredibly alive.

It was when Elena decided to leave the bedroom and go downstairs that she realized something was unusually different. She had removed her daylight ring last night when she had taken a shower. It was still inside the bathroom where she had left it on the counter. Meaning she had just stepped into the sunlight at the windows and hadn't burned up. Shocked, Elena tried to rush for her ring, but the speed was no longer there. She then instead hurried for her ring and then ran downstairs to find someone. Anyone.

Stefan and Damon were just entering the house when she came downstairs and she stared at them in wild panic.

"Elena?" asked Stefan softly, seeing her upset that seemed oblivious to Damon.

Elena then bolted past them, running from the house. Damon moved to go after her but Stefan grabbed his brother by the arm to stop him first from doing so.

"Stefan, what?" Damon snapped, annoyed that he'd stop him from chasing after Elena.

"Didn't you hear that?" asked Stefan, sounding stunned.

"Hear what?" Damon said, irritated.

"Her heart beat." Stefan replied softly.

Damon then stared at Stefan in disbelief. After a long silence Damon pushed away from Stefan and moved to leave to find Elena before anyone else did.

* * *

"What the hell are you doing here?" shouted Elena angrily into the darkness.

She had found herself at wickery bridge and it was night fall now. She had watched the sun go down and thought briefly about jumping into the familiarity of the lake that had a habit of trying to claim her life.

Elena never thought that she would consider suicide again. Especially given the cause. There had been a time that she had wanted this more than anything, not too long ago. But she had surrendered it in order to be with Damon Salvatore.

A decision made when she believed there to be more than one cure, but she had stood by it all the same. She had decided that she was in love with Damon and she didn't want to turn away from those feelings. That meant shutting the door on the one thing she wanted more than anything. He refused to be human with her and flat out said he wouldn't want her this way.

Where did that leave them? Elena, thinking about it now, hated that Damon Salvatore had become such a large part of her life. Everything that she had become had revolved around her new life with Damon. If Elena were honest with herself it was why she had chosen Damon and not Stefan.

After becoming a vampire Elena no longer knew how to function on her own. Being with Damon made all of that easier. He did everything for her, made every decision for her, and she allowed him too.

Stefan expected her to still be the same person she was before and she just wasn't after everything that had happened. Choosing Damon when she did had really seemed to be the only choice for her to make at the time. But perhaps it had been the wrong choice to make. Because here she was again, faced with the possibility of being alone, and she was again frightened by what that all could mean.

How did this even happen? Katherine had become a vampire again, but why did it affect her in anyway? They were doppelgangers, but they were so different.

Elijah, standing there in stunned silence in the darkness with her, speechless by what he was witnessing. At first when he noticed her in the dark he thought her to be Katherine and perhaps the spell that the witch performed in order for Katherine to be able to accept his blood had failed after all. But he had been wrong at the identity of the woman he had followed. This wasn't Katherine, this was Elena, and she was very much human. He could smell her blood from here.

"Elena, I had no idea that this would happen. I am so very sorry," Elijah finally said, finding his voice.

Elena, filled with a hatred that was so out of character, flashed angry brown eyes his way. "_How could you do it_. You put her before me, _she, who betrayed you_, and now I'm the one who's suffering." said Elena in tears.

"Regaining your humanity doesn't absolve you of _your past_ Elena," Elijah replied, but not spitefully. He no longer bore anger in the events that had lead to his brothers deaths. Events that Elena had held a strong hand in for responsibility. "I know full well, more than anyone, of the things that she has done."

"You still picked her life over mine. What about my life, Elijah? You said that you didn't know, but you never cared enough to look into this before you got that witch to perform that_ damned spell _either."

"Elena, there was a time, no so long ago, that you wanted to regain your humanity. Has being with Damon Salvatore really changed your mind that much?'

Elena scoffed but said nothing. Her answer to that question was no. She had chosen to stay this way believing it was easier to let things be taken care of for her. Damon had promised her just that and stayed true to that promise. But she was no longer the vampire he had sworn that too. She hadn't wanted to stay this way because she had actually been in love with Damon. Elena knew the truth now and it hurt to realize that she had let go of so much in order to hold onto the lie she had built around herself in order to be with Damon.

"I see that I have over stepped myself," Elijah replied after seeing the distress in her face. This change had made Elena face some harsh truths. Things she wasn't ready to face. It was why she was here. The place where she had lost her life. Because she had just lost it again. "Elena," He started softly, and she faced him, visibility broken in the darkness of the night. "Perhaps there will be a way around this. Do you wish to become a vampire again?"

Elena blinked, and then looked away, guilty. "I still wish that I was, Elijah. I wish that this never happened. But no. I don't want to be a vampire. It's time I stop lying to myself. I wasn't meant to be one. I was no good at it."

Elena then moved for the bridge rail and proceeded to clime over it.

"Elena, what are you doing?" Elijah insisted.

"I meant what I said. I really don't want to be what I was. I was too different from who I used to be. And this," Elena shrugged at herself, to her newly turned human form. "I stopping knowing how to be her, my old self, when I lost Stefan. And I don't want this Elijah. _Not without him_. Please, don't stop me," Elena told him honestly through thick tears.

Elijah's heart broke upon hearing the very real pain that Elena was in. She couldn't be a vampire without Damon, and she didn't want to be human without Stefan by her side, yet she stood to lose both brothers forever. Damon refused to hold on to a love that could eventually die with time, and Stefan might not be able to let go of the past in order to be with her again as she was now. Elena would choose death rather than find out if she had lost Damon and Stefan both.

"Elena, what about _Jeremy_? Would you really choose to leave him behind forever after just getting him back? And your friends... _Caroline... Bonnie._.. they would not want this for you. Elena, please. I won't stop you from choosing to decide neither of the choices that you have, but I will not watch you kill yourself when you've been given a second chance to live as you should have, before all of this came into your life."

Elena seemed to freeze at the realization that she was about to try and kill herself in front of someone that had all means to stop her before she could do it.

Elijah then offered out his hand to her, giving her the choice to get down herself before he dragged her off the bridge.

Begrudgingly Elena accepted his hand and allowed Elijah to help her down. The sun started to rise. Elena staggered a bit but regained her footing when Elijah helped her up right. She paused briefly, taking the time to meet Elijah's steady gaze. "Promise me Elena that this is over. You won't try too..."

Elena frowned and then slumped slightly, defeated. "I won't Elijah. At least, not tonight. I'm too tired to even try."

Elijah felt afraid to let her slip away from his arms, but backed away on instinct upon noticing they were no longer alone. Damon and Stefan had both found them. And Elijah said nothing, but took in the hard, judging gazes from the brothers. The scene between himself and Elena would have looked most inappropriate to any who had no idea that Elena had just tried to kill herself. He continued saying nothing, allowing Elena to slip away from him completely and back to Damon. Damon gave him a deadly glare before gently leading Elena away to his car in the distance. Stefan looked to him questionably before silently following after his brother and Elena.

They would leave this be tonight, but Elijah suspected that Damon would not let this go. Deciding himself to leave this be for the night, he decided to see Katerina before returning to his family home in Mystic Falls. They had said very little since she had become a vampire again, and they had a lot to talk about.


	2. Chapter 2

"I can't believe this is happening," whispered Damon.

He stared after Elena who had quietly left them alone downstairs to go to bed early. Damon noticed that she had chosen a guest room, indicating that she wanted to be alone. Damon wanted more than anything to go after her, to swear that they would try to resolve this, but he stopped himself. He knew that deep down that Elena didn't want to be a vampire, and had hated her transformation.

Damon felt incredibly guilty for not encouraging Elena to take the cure when she had the chance. Instead he had done the most selfish thing he could and used their relationship to get Elena to make the choice he had wanted her to make. It had been because of his fear of what would happen if Elena had become human again.

She couldn't love him as a human. Elena had chosen his brother. The good brother who would have happily surrendered his immortality if it meant living a human life with her. Stefan had loved Elena that much. And Elena would have done the same for Stefan if they had been still together. But he couldn't give something like that to Elena. Not in a thousand years. Because Damon would never sacrifice anything of himself for anyone else. Not even for the girl he loved.

So how could he help her through this? Damon had already made the decision that making Elena a vampire again wasn't an option. When Katherine had tried it she had nearly died in the attempt. It wasn't until Elijah had decided to save the day that it had actually worked.

Now Katherine was a vampire again. This time made by original blood. And Elena was to pay the price for Katherine's bid to save her own life.

"It's what she wanted, Damon. Once the shock wears off, Elena _will be happy_ about this," argued Stefan softly.

"I'm sure you will be too, _brother_," Damon bit accusingly. He felt Elena slipping away from him, piece by piece.

"Damon, this is about her. Not you and me. This is a new chance for her."

"Why do I feel like I've already lost her, Stefan?" replied Damon, sounding lost.

"I don't think I can answer that for you, Damon. _When I lost her_, I knew it._ I felt it_," Stefan went on. "But we both got through it. We both _survived_."

"And you broke up..."

"You would know that better than anyone, brother," Stefan quipped a bit darkly.

"You still think it was because of me, Stefan? It was that damned sire bond... if it never happened, you two would still be together and Elena would have been the one that became human with the stupid cure..."

"I don't think Elena would be any happier right now Damon, even if she was _still with me_."

"How can you say that?" Damon snapped. "It undid everything _good in her life_..."

"Remember when we became a vampire,_ how hard_ the transition was to fight? How can it be any easier to do the opposite? To be _what we are_, and then become human again... We need to give her a chance to deal with this. It took Katherine the longest time to try and deal with this."

"_Katherine_... what is with you two, _Stefan_? Are you really back with her, after everything that she did?"

"It was over 145 years ago Damon... people change..."

"Stefan, _seriously_, Katherine?" Damon shook his head.

"It wasn't too long ago that you were willing to forget everything if it meant you could be with her again," Stefan countered softly. "I was happy with her once. I think I could be again."

"What about Elijah? He moved heaven and hell to save her life. You think he's really done with Katherine?"

"No. Maybe..." Stefan shrugged. "It's up to her... if she chooses Elijah, Damon, I'm going to leave Mystic Falls for awhile."

Damon's instinct was to argue that immediately. They had just got Stefan back it seemed. And that in itself had seemed impossible in so many ways. Not only for what Silas did to him, but for the reason Stefan wanted to leave to begin with. Losing Elena had changed everything for Stefan. Despite the part he played in causing so much hurt to Stefan, Damon selfishly longed for his brother to stay. But he knew that he couldn't ask that of him.

"Stefan, I want you to find a way to be happy again. That's all," Damon declared softly. And if that meant Stefan being with Katherine, Damon would force himself to accept it. He had Elena, after all. The feelings he had once himself for Katherine had died at her admittance that she had always preferred Stefan. Could he really take the same thing from Elena should that happen now that she was human again?

Damon believed that a part of Stefan never stopped loving Katherine, but Damon also knew that if given the chance Stefan would go back to Elena without a seconds hesitation. He had loved Katherine, but Stefan had loved Elena more.

"Either way. If Katherine wants to be with me or not, I think it's time that I leave. It's just... too much, being here. I tried to do this... but I can't."

Damon nodded, understanding, and knowing full well why his brother couldn't stand being here anymore. It was because Elena was here _and with him_. Stefan might not ever be alright with that.

And Stefan didn't seem to realize the writing on the wall when it came to Elena. She might _still_ be with him, but that likely wasn't going to last long. Elena had never been able to love him as a human, it took her being a vampire to choose him. That thought stayed with Damon for the rest of the day.

* * *

Stefan knocked on Elena's bedroom door, stepping inside her room when she failed to invite him inside the small space. This bedroom was one of the smallest inside of the Salvatore boarding house. Elena seemed to appreciate the small space. She was huddled up against the wall the bed was against with her back to him. Elena briefly reminded Stefan of a small child. She turned around to face him upon seeing she was no longer by herself.

"What do you want Stefan?" Elena managed tiredly. She flopped her feet on the side of the bed and smiled painfully, trying to fake interest.

"I want to know what you think about all of this," Stefan replied, trying to be upbeat. He sat in the chair across from the bed. "It must be quite the... change. You wanted this a long time ago, but then you got used to being a vampire..."

"I did want this," Elena said softly. "I wanted it more than anything in the world, to be human again. But then I decided to stand by this. My life changed, and not for the better, but I got used to it. I wasn't any good at being a vampire, but I was managing to stick by my decision. And now this happened..." Elena finished, sounding angry.

"What decision?" Stefan asked, confused.

"Damon..." Elena replied uneasily. "When we thought there was more then one cure, I asked Damon if he was going to take the cure too. He refused. He said that he'd rather be a vampire than spend a few short years with me like this. So I decided to stay a vampire,_ for him_. I didn't... I didn't want to be alone... And now, I am more alone than ever..."

Stefan frowned sadly at her upon hearing why she decided not to take the cure. Elena had allowed Damon to manipulate her into making the decision he wanted her to make. Stefan knew that Elena was capable of thinking for herself, but she had allowed Damon to make every choice for her since they had got together. Since Damon didn't do this, make this choice for her, Elena didn't know what to think anymore. She didn't know how to accept this. "Damon isn't going to breakup with you, Elena, because you've become human. He loved you even before you turned."

Elena frowned at Stefan, ready to argue, but said nothing. She bit her lip. Tears filled her eyes and she started to cry. "Then why do I feel like I have nothing left Stefan?"

Stefan looked like he was going to answer her, but her doppelganger appeared at her bedroom door. Katherine beamed at them and Elena felt like killing her on sight. "Can we talk... Stefan?" Katherine cooed softly.

Stefan's face immediately brightened and Elena felt like she was looking in a mirror to the past as she watched Stefan get up and embrace Katherine close. Elena felt her tears turn hot as she watched Stefan casually say they'd talk later and leave with Katherine in his arms. How did that even happen? Elena thought spitefully, hatefully.

Had she been so involved in her own life that she didn't notice Stefan fall for Katherine_ of all people_? Elena looked away at the corner of the room and let the tears fall as she tried not to think of why it bothered her so much to see Stefan with someone else.

* * *

It had been a two full days before Elena started to explore the rest of the Salvatore house again. She found her way to the kitchen first, unable to deny her hunger for food any longer. It was a room in the house that Elena rarely entered. Damon kept a small portable refrigerator inside his bedroom, and Elena had used it to store her blood in there as well. Elena found some fruit and vegtables that grew outside, nothing but blood in the fridge itself.

Stefan had told her once they kept a small garden in the nice weather to help keep up the appearance of being human. Elena suspected that Stefan was the one that bothered to do so. Elena just couldn't see Damon gardening in the back yard.

The garden looked unkempt, but some things had survived likely months of neglect. Elena felt a tinge of guilt. Stefan hadn't kept this up, likely because of everything that had happened over the last several months. She died, became a vampire and had needed everyone's help, and Elena had repaid that help in the worst way possible, to everyone.

Elena gathered what she could from the garden, placing the veggies and fruit into a large dish she had taken from the old country style kitchen, and she was startled upon noticing she was no longer alone.

"Damn," She murmured a loud, spilling some of the dish. "Meek human here," Elena then told the vampire who watched her with a smile to his handsome face. Elena was a bit surprised at how stunning Elijah was in the day light. It had been a while since she had seen him through human eyes. Elena then became quickly annoyed, remembering what hate Elijah had managed to stir within her just hours ago.

Elena was this way now because Elijah had risked her welfare to save his girlfriend. She wondered if Elijah knew how close Katherine was to Stefan. Elena thought better of mentioning it. No matter of her dislike for Katherine, Elena didn't want to see what Stefan looked like with his heart ripped out.

"You're not here to see me," said Elena, not being able to keep the distaste from her tone.

"Not at first," Elijah admitted softly. "I was here to see Katherine, but it appears that she has made her choice. She wants to be with Stefan..." Elijah trailed off, studying the pained look upon Elena's face.

"Hey, I just found out about that for the first time myself last night," Elena said, knowing that Elijah was looking for an indication of otherwise. "Not a pretty sight." She quipped.

Elena then lead the way into the kitchen, wanting to avoid a conversation about their ex's getting together. It had confused her and it had hurt. Elena didn't know what else to say or feel about that. It was no longer her place to have any feelings at all on the subject, and that was what she was trying to do. After all, Stefan never tried to get her feelings about her new relationship with Damon out of her. Elena owed him that same respect about Katherine.

"How are you doing?" Elijah asked, following her all the way to the fridge.

"Well," Elena started, trying to forget that she had just tried to kill herself last night. "I'm still here. I haven't done anything... Elijah."

Elena felt herself shaking and went about setting down everything on the table.

"Did you tell Damon how you feel about all of this?" Elijah asked softly after a long silence.

"What, that I feel like I'm done? That I don't want to do any of this anymore?" Elena continued, anger rising in her tone. "Elijah, he doesn't do _emotions_ and _feelings_ well. He isn't into _the human thing_. I picked the brother that won't want me this way, _alright_? I'm just going to have to deal with it."

"Elena, you have a right to share this. You don't need to keep all of this inside of you. _Damon_ will want to know how you_ feel_."

"I nearly killed myself and became human _yesterday_," Elena shot back. "He still hasn't asked me anything_ yet_."

Elena then started to cry again and she felt like cursing herself. The one brother that had cared to ask was no longer her boyfriend. Stefan belonged to _someone else_ now. "Everything is _so screwed up_, Elijah. I was supposed to be with Stefan, not her. I had to be selfish and I drove him away because I never knew what I wanted."

"Do you_ really_ regret your choice, _Elena_? I find it difficult to believe that you don't care about _Damon_..."

Elena frowned and then fought to stop her tears. She smiled painfully at Elijah. "No. _I do_ love him... I just... I'm _so_ tired of living Elijah... I'm tired of hurting people._ I'm tired_ of losing them. If I was a vampire I think I would have eventually shut it all off again. It was so much easier..."

Elena tried to leave the kitchen but Elijah stopped her for a surprising hug. She welcomed the contact. It was actually the first time in awhile that anyone held her like this. Damon holding her usually was for something else entirely. Elena buried herself in Elijah's arms and remembered a simpler time with a wistful smile to her face. He held her like that and time seemed to stand still.


	3. Chapter 3

"You spent a lot of time with _Elijah_ today," spoke a familiar voice. Elena had returned to her newly claimed bedroom to find her boyfriend lazily flopped on her bed.

Elena blinked, feeling rather dumbfounded by that statement. After everything that had happened to her, leave it to Damon to get jealous over another guy, rather than ask her how she was doing. "_I did_," replied Elena icily. "He wanted to know how I was doing,_ you know_, with suddenly becoming_ human_."

Damon frowned, not liking where this was going. "Elena, this has to be _really bad_ for you. But it doesn't have to be. You _wanted_ to be human..." Damon tried softly.

"But that was before I got used to being a _vampire_, Damon. I got used to it because of you. You took your time with me. You did everything you could to help me... And now,_ it was for nothing_. I'm this _version_ of myself again, and if I'm anything like Katherine was, there is no going back..."

"You shouldn't live with that kind of life _Elena_ because you _got used to it._ You should have stayed a vampire before because_ you wanted to actually be one_. I wanted you to _stay a vampire_ because I wanted you to _want to be with me_. I was afraid that if you had taken that cure I would have lost you to my brother. But I should have told you to _take that damn cure_. You wouldn't be going through this now. You would have had _Stefan_ to help you through this." Damon rose from the bed and went toward her.

Elena let Damon hold her hands in his and she hated how different this felt now. "Why can't you be enough to get me through this Damon? You always bring up _Stefan_..." Elena shook her head, trying to forget those feelings she had felt earlier, seeing Stefan with Katherine in his arms. A girl with her face...

"Maybe I will be the one to ruin this," Damon replied softly, seeing the distance in her eyes. "You don't feel the same way about me anymore, do you, Elena?"

Elena quickly looked Damon in the face, ready to deny it. If she lost Damon that meant she really was alone. But that wasn't the right reason to hold on to someone, was it? "Damon," Elena started uneasily. "I know that I love you, but...I don't know how to deal with this. I don't know how to be the old me. I don't know how to do anything anymore, and I don't know if I can see myself with you in_ fifty years_, if that's what you're wondering. Me, _old _and _in retirement_, and_ you_, as you are _now_..." Elena shrugged, feeling lost. "_Stefan_ and I, we never even figured that out before I became a _vampire_..."

Damon frowned again. _Stefan_. She faulted him for managing to bring up his brother in their conversations, but Elena did it too. "Well, if you love me, despite being _this way_, we can do this, Elena. We can make this work." Damon touched her shoulders and Elena shrugged away from him.

"Oh, I get it," Damon then spat after a short silence, studying her face.

"Get _what_ Damon?" asked Elena in mild annoyance.

"You just lied to me to make sure that I don't go anywhere," Damon accused her. "I'm not Stefan, so you believe that we won't work together anymore now that this happened. But you don't want to say it because it means you'll be alone. And you were trying to get me to think it was how_ I felt_..."

Damon looked furious and Elena sighed, watching him go. A part of her was heartbroken that this might be the end of their relationship for good, but there was another part of her that was so tired of things like this that Elena didn't care enough to go after him. Damon's sudden outbursts when he refused to accept that someone might actually care. But there was another part of Elena that felt that Damon was right. Perhaps she was no good at pretending anymore with him.

* * *

Elena woke up the next day to find her new favourite visitor at her bedroom door. "Elijah," She spoke softly, letting herself admit that she really liked seeing Elijah at her bedroom door.

Elena let her robe slip slightly and she noticed the new edge to Elijah's frame. Perhaps he had been noticing her differently too. "Elena... I..." Elena invaded his personal space, taking the chance at touching his shirt inside his suit jacket. She kept it there when he didn't push her away. "Elena... I wanted to see how you were... how you were..."

His words died on his lips with her kiss. He pulled his head back sharply when she bit his lip, fighting for control over himself. Elijah knew he should push her away but he didn't. "I think we've both always wanted this," Elena whispered seductively, before Elijah, decided, gave in with uncharacteristic abandon.

* * *

Elijah awakened later that afternoon to find that his new bed partner hadn't yet left her bed. Feelings of guilt overcame Elijah immediately. He felt he had taken advantage of Elena given the emotional state she had been in since becoming human again. Elijah couldn't even say if he knew she was still with Damon Salvatore or not. He hadn't bothered to ask her and at the time he didn't care.

Elijah told himself that this likely would have happened some day. There had been something always there, but they had both dismissed it without giving it a voice. Elena had been so young when they had first met, and she had been firmly between the Salvatore's. At first, unwittingly so. She had fallen for the younger brother first, then Damon, when she turned vampire.

Now she was human again, never believing once that it would ever be possible. And again, Elena was losing parts of her self with the change. She believed her relationship with Damon was doomed to fail as she had with Stefan when becoming vampire. Now she was with him, here, in this moment.

Elijah felt too much for her to simply fall into the category of not the greatest choice for her, or the great love she allowed to slip away because she stopped believing she was a good person. Elijah lifted Elena gently back onto her pillows, taking a moment to watch her sleep. She then opened her eyes just when he was ready to leave the bed. Arms caught him, guiding him down to her.

Caught up in the disbelieving reality of the moment, Elijah allowed her to again lead them where he'd never go on his own. Forgotten was her remarkable likeness to his two former past love's and suddenly this was just him and just her.

A sea of dark hair covered parts of her body as she took control, taking them to a place where he had never thought was possible for the two of them. Elijah gave into it at her insistence, letting go of his feelings that this wasn't the right thing to do, right now. Elena was lost, not herself and this was behaviour out of the complete ordinary for her.

They would have to talk about this, whatever this was for her, for him, later. Elijah just hoped that there would be more to this. He let go of his thoughts, taking in the beauty which rode him, breasts exposed and bouncing slightly as she used him to shut out the world.


	4. Chapter 4

Stefan smiled when he shut the front door to the Salvatore boarding house. He smiled again when he entered the large living room and stared into the fireplace. Who would have believed that his key to getting over his feelings for Elena would be to fall in love again with Katherine? And he was in love. Honestly and completely with her.

No more lies stood between them. And they had forever to work through the problems that started their relationship in the first place. Stefan knew that staying here wasn't an option forever. Not with Katherine anyway. Not with Damon and Elena still both living here too. _And Elijah lurking about._..

Stefan froze upon noticing the Original, dressing into a suit jacket that had been removed obviously while he had been upstairs, stepping rather quickly down the stairs that lead to the guest bedrooms of the large house. The area of the house that Elena had been living in since becoming human, doing her best to avoid Damon and himself. _Especially_ Damon.

Stefan, strangely, felt no feelings of jealousy when he realized that Elijah had been a guest in the house, and a guest that had been welcomed into Elena's bedroom. The Original carried her scent. In fact, he reeked of Elena. Stefan then felt slightly proud. He had succeeded letting go of Elena, _finally_. And this moment was proof. But he couldn't help but feel curious about the unexpected hookup on behalf of his brother. As far as Stefan knew Elena was _still with_ his brother and this wasn't something that Elena did. _Cheat._

Stefan pushed back the argument to that fact in his head which was brewing. He hadn't been broken up with Elena a full day before she had taken Damon to her bed. Stefan knew there had been circumstances, but it hadn't lessened the pain or feelings of betrayal he had felt then. At Elena and Damon both. Elena was more her old self now than she had ever been in a long time, and yet this couldn't be more out of character for her.

Elena, _the old Elena,_ would never do something like this.

Elijah gave him a nod, and the usual _hello Stefan_, choosing to ignore the unspoken question of what he had been doing upstairs. And Stefan decided to let it go, telling himself it wasn't his place anymore to ask. That would be up to Damon when the time came.

* * *

Elijah had left and Elena dressed for the day, trying to ignore the feelings of guilt that plagued her. She had just broken up with Damon, and somehow her emotions had lead her into making a decision she never believed she'd ever make.

There had always been something there, something very intense. But Elena had just guessed it had been due to his history with _Tatia_, and then _Katherine_. She shared the exact likeness of two women he had loved for most of his his life. Of course he'd feel something toward her too. But Elena had never did anything about it until last night.

She hadn't dreamed there would ever be a time where she'd push him to where he could no longer deny his attraction to her. They had fallen into bed and hadn't looked back until the morning.

A new awkwardness was there and it made Elena feel like she'd driven away her last friend. This was even different from her disastrous choices with Stefan and Damon. Elijah kissed her cheek softly and whispered goodbye. Elena felt a bitter tinge of anger, feeling used. But she had asked for this.

It had been a way to shut out the confusion and the pain, and Elena had wanted that more than anything. She hadn't thought about Stefan or Damon for once either and it had been amazing to just let go.

Elena finished dressing after Elijah had left, wondering if this had been one of the biggest mistakes she could possibly have made. It wasn't like Elijah even lived in Mystic Falls anymore. He had been here for Katherine, _to save her_, and to see if there were more to their relationship to be had. For once, his visit had nothing to do with Elena herself. It had made Elena feel jealous almost to realize she no longer held Elijah's attention in the same way. It had been the same where Stefan had been concerned.

Had she really become so petty? Elena blinked, feeling more lost than ever before. She left her new bedroom after dressing and went downstairs, happy that Elijah had in fact left the house altogether. As much as she was curious over his feelings over what had happened between them, she also hated facing the possibility that he regretted it entirely.

Elena went to go into the kitchen and stopped half way down the corridor, not expecting to see Damon of all people come out of the room that had become a safe haven of sorts for her from him and Stefan. He looked greatly upset and Elena found herself wanting to ignore him, but she knew it would be impossible.

"So quick to move on, _huh_?" Damon spat immediately.

Elena sighed tiredly. "Damon, it was _nothing_... _and_, it's none of your concern..."

Damon then grabbed her arm and turned her to face him gently. "We just broke up, _Elena_. And you go to bed with _someone else_, especially_ him_..."

Elena yanked her arm free of him, bitterly. "Maybe that's what I do, _Damon_. I go to bed with men to forget the fact that I have no one anymore..."

Damon swallowed hard and Elena knew right away that she had really hurt him. "So that's what I was to you? Just someone to use because you didn't have my brother anymore?"

Elena was at a loss on how to answer him back. Was that how she had really felt? Elena honestly couldn't say anymore. She had believed so much that she had fallen in love with Damon, but perhaps it actually been her just her way of dealing with losing Stefan. "_Damon_..." Elena trailed off painfully, not wanting to hurt him further. Elena had no idea what she felt about anything anymore. "I think... maybe, I should move out... Jeremy and I both... I can't do this anymore..." She confessed.

"Where would you go _Elena_?" Damon replied, a new desperation to his tone. "Your house is gone, and Ric..." Damon stopped himself at the mention of Alaric, hating that he brought him up. Hating it because it hurt Elena and he knew it. A reminder that she was orphaned many times over. "Elena.."

"I know," Elena snapped coldly, backing away from his reach. "I know that I burned down my house and that Ric is gone... _I know it_, Damon. But he left Jeremy and I his loft apartment. We haven't got around to cleaning it out, but we could stay there..."

"Jeremy will need a guardian, Elena. He can't live on his own while you're at college.." Damon argued, trying anything to get her to change her mind.

"I've decided to leave school..." Elena countered softly. "_I _can be there for him. I should have decided this from the start."

"How will you afford something like that, Elena..."

"Ric left us the apartment and what money he had. Our parents left us quite a bit too. The insurance came through on the house thanks to Caroline deciding to compel the insurance agent who investigated the fire. And it turns out that my mother... Isobel... well, lets just say that I won't be short of money for awhile," Elena finished rather dryly. "Goodbye, Damon. I''ll get our things out by tomorrow..." Elena finished lastly and then moved to go.

"Wait, Elena, don't... _don't go_..." Damon pleaded. "We can get through this... your just... _confused_."

Elena gasped when she turned to face him and he was trying to compel her to stay. Elena slapped him across the face, hard. Damon released her immediately as if she burned him. "And you accuse me of using you when you are more then prepared to do the same to me..." She hissed. "It's over, Damon..." Elena spat bitterly. Elena hurried to flee but Damon stopped her, blocking her way to the front door.

Damon looked at her, furious. He wasn't going to let her go and Elena knew it. He grabbed her and pulled Elena to him roughly. "I _just_ got you... I'm never going to let you go, _Elena_," Damon said in a dangerous promise. "Damon, no!" Elena cried out but he readied to compel her again anyway.

"_You will never leave me, you will always love me,"_ Damon told her desperately.

Damon suddenly released Elena as he was pushed to the floor, which caused Elena to fall to the floor as well, hitting her head.

"What the hell did you do, _Damon_?" snapped Stefan darkly, standing over his brother.

Damon seemed to have awakened from a deep slumber and stared wildly back at his brother after realizing what he had just done. He had tried to actually force Elena to stay with him, to love him, removing her free will entirely. She'd never forgive him now.

"Just go!" Stefan barked, moving to help Elena.

Damon was gone when Stefan looked up again while holding Elena in his arms. Stefan sighed heavily, feeling relief that Damon never put up more of a fight. Stefan carried Elena upstairs to her new bed and waited for Elena to wake up. Stefan decided that he would help her leave his brother if that is what she wanted.

It wasn't long ago that Stefan had desired for this to happen. For Elena to come to the decision on her own that her relationship with Damon was over, but he never wanted it to be like this. All three of them hurt and damaged by the outcome. And Stefan never imaged that he would reach a point where he was over losing Elena, but he had found it, and with Katherine. Stefan decided that he would help Elena and her brother settle elsewhere, but that would be as far as he got involved with it. He had moved on and Elena should be allowed to do the same. If that wasn't going to be with Damon, then so be it.

* * *

A week later and Elena and Jeremy were settled into Alaric's old apartment. It felt good to have their own home again, and Elena and Jeremy both flourished because of the change. For once, Elena wasn't focused on her romantic life and she simply just got to be herself again.

She paused upon hearing that Stefan had made good on his promise to leave Mystic Falls with Katherine. It was hard to hear that he was able to find love again with the one who bore her face and resembled her in nearly every way possible. A part of Elena hoped it was because Stefan secretly was still in love with her and settled for Katherine when he couldn't have her. But Elena knew it was much more to it. Stefan was really in love again and he wasn't going to look back when he could have forever with the woman he loved now. Elena wanted to be happy for him, but she couldn't be.

Damon had vanished off the face of the earth it seemed after Stefan left town with Katherine. The Salvatore house was vacant for the first time in nearly five years and Elena knew that she'd likely never see either brother again. She had hurt them too much, especially Damon. He had only wanted her love and she could never give it to him when it came down to it. Their relationship had ended it bitterness as result.

A few months passed and Elena and Jeremy both were working at the Mystic Grill with Matt. Caroline had went to New Orleans with Klaus, leaving college behind her for now, and Tyler. Caroline said she would always love Tyler, but she couldn't be with him when she wanted somebody else, and Tyler couldn't ever really be with her it seemed either. Caroline wanted a love that would last forever and never leave her. She felt Klaus would give her that and more. Elena admired Caroline for so purely following her heart, even if it was to Klaus. He made Caroline happy and if he could do that, Elena would leave them in peace. Caroline deserved such joy.

Bonnie had the veil fall and she was a witch again, which she loved. It was unclear what had really become of the other side as no one seemed to be in their reality that wasn't supposed to be here. Elena knew that her brother had plans to live with Bonnie at college next year and Elena wondered what the change would bring her. She'd be on her own for the first time, ever.

Bonnie wanted her to come back to school, but Elena was decided in her choice. That part of her life was over. It was time to move on.

Elena began dating Matt again after Jeremy moved that summer. It was sweet, it was wonderful, and Elena was happy with Matt. But she wasn't in love with him. Matt asked her to marry him on what would have been her twentieth birthday. Elena said yes, swearing she loved him. This was the life she was supposed to have after all. She tried to tell herself that it would have been this way, if there had been no Stefan and Damon in her life. Being with Matt was choosing the right thing for once.

A week before the wedding, Elena ran away from home, sick of the pretending and the lies she was telling herself. She had loved Matt once in her life, but not now. She was still in love with the boy vampire she had met during her third year of high school. The boy she let slip away when she became a vampire, trying to tell herself that she didn't deserve him anymore. The boy she hurt beyond repair when she fell into bed with his brother. The boy who's heart she shattered when she was finally free of the sire bond and she made yet another wrong choice out of need. The sire bond had taught her how to need and rely on Damon for everything, and Elena no longer knew how to live without him when it had come down to it. So she had chosen to be with Damon, again. At the time, Elena really had believed it to be the right choice to make. She had believed it to be love. How it hurt now to realize her mistake.

He found her again, on the bridge. This time, she was ready to die.

"Stay away from me!" Elena raged at him.

"Elena, you don't want this. Not really. You just want the pain to stop."

"You left me too!" Elena spat viciously. "What do you really care, Elijah?"

"I left you Elena, because I could never be able to give you the things that you deserve. You choosing Matt Donovan was the best thing for you," Elijah replied softly, hating to see Elena was again at this point.

"Matt deserves to be with someone who loves him, Elijah. He's a good man. My doing this will only help him see what a mistake he was making with me," Elena confessed brokenly.

Elena moved up more on the rail and she looked back when noticing Elijah stood closer to her now. He wasn't going to let her do this. "Please, don't stop me, Elijah," She begged.

"I will give you a choice," Elijah said in stead, surprising her.

"What?" Elena asked, confused.

"Come with me, and I'll make you a vampire again, since you are so insistent on killing yourself anyway. Or, you attempt to kill yourself and I stop you, and force you to live out your remaining days, happily compelled to forget this notion that you have."

"I can't become a vampire. When Katherine was like this, she couldn't digest vampire blood. And she's a vampire now, so I won't be able too, so stop trying to distract me, Elijah..."

Elena turned to jump and suddenly she was in Elijah's arms. The force of him catching her knocked the wind out of her. She had no time to scream before he forced her to drink his blood and he snapped her neck before they reached the ground.

Elijah then carried the lifeless body of Elena Gilbert before dumping her into the lake from the spot on the bridge from where she wanted to die. It would be a lesson he hoped that she'd never forget. He stood at the bridge and stared down at the lake, waiting to see what would become of Elena Gilbert.

Would she emerge from the water a vampire again, or would she finally get her wish? Perhaps she'd just be dead.


	5. Chapter 5

Elijah could sense life at the bottom of the lake and so he waited. Elena had survived his gamble with her life. He hoped the experience would jolt her from the sea of depression that she was wallowing in once again. And if she happened to become a vampire again, he would help her through it. He'd give her the proper guidance she had lacked the first time around.

Damon Salvatore had used the sire bond to bend Elena to his will, insisting she choose his way, or no way at all. He especially made use of it when he became aware of their new connection. It had only added to Elena's confusion and worsened her transition into a vampire. Elena had barely made it through with Damon's _help._

But if something different happened, Elijah decided he would see her through it as well. Elena no longer had the Salvatore's to help her through the world of the supernatural and seemed utterly lost without their help. He'd help her and when the time came, he'd let her go.

The water below began to move and there emerged Elena Gilbert, fighting to breath. Fighting to live. Elijah smiled. He went down the hill to the water, prepared to help her.

* * *

Elijah escorted Elena back to the house his family shared when they were in Mystic Falls. It would do her no good to see her brother right now. Her emotions were all over the place, and he suspected they had remained that way since Elena had become human again. She had just gotten better at hiding them and pretending that everything was fine.

She had awakened once since last night and refused to agree that calling her Fiance Matt was a good idea. Despite Elena's confusion about where that relationship stood, she and Matt Donovan had been friends since early childhood. The young man cared about Elena and had always been there for her. That was the kind of support that Elena needed right now, whether she liked it or not.

Elijah suspected that she wasn't going to turn into a vampire. The blood had helped Elena survive what he had done to her, but her heart was still beating, even a full day after her emerging from the lake. Elijah secretly admitted his disappointment to himself that Elena would likely never be a vampire again.

He told himself that he acted out of effort to help save Elena from herself, but he knew there was more to it on his part. He felt a connection with her. Elijah always had. And that one night they had decided to explore that connection had never quite left him. He first tried to tell himself that his new interest in Elena was just from the fact he had just lost Katherine to Stefan. Elena had bore the same face and had been willing to be with him when Katherine no longer desired to be. But it was much more then that to the ever growing complicated relationship he shared with Elena Gilbert.

Ever so gradually, Elijah had been slowly falling in love with Elena. She was in his nearly every thought. He had never tried to think much about his feelings because he knew she wasn't to be had by anyone but a Salvatore brother. Just like his Katerina.

But now things were different. Katerina had once again stepped centre stage with the Salvatore's and Elena was alone. Matt Donovan failed to capture the heart of Elena Gilbert from the memory of two vampire brothers who no longer cared for her. Could he be the one? Did he dare too?

Elijah went upstairs to Elena's bedroom and stood in the door way, surprised at the change over her. His blood had not made her vampire, but she was immortal. He sensed it about her. And she was powerful.

"_Elena_..." Elijah whispered, in awe at this unexpected development.

"Apparently I inherited the Petrova traveller gene," The doppelganger said softly. Watching feathers float around her head. "Bonnie isn't going to believe this..." Elena said in a tone that reminded Elijah of the girl he had first knew. Amazed wonder crossed her features and Elijah beheld her joy as if it was his own.

Perhaps Elena would find new life outside her broken circle after all.

**THE END**


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